i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
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