come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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