Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
