i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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