Are we in a gay sports bar?
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Randomize
