why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
You're a waste of cheezeits
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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