He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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