at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize
