Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
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