i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
