Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
a search helicopter?!
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
