Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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