I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
