guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Randomize
