We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
