Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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