Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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