the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
