Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I wish i was in the wii world.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
