You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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