was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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