i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
