Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
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