It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Randomize
