Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
