i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
