The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
