I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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