Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
You're a waste of cheezeits
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
