i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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