i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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