I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
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