How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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