Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
