whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
