sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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