turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
lets start a swedish sibling band together
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
MIDGETS
????
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Randomize
