So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
