whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
birth control should be required to get into college
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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