So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Randomize
