i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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