I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
