so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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