Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
