just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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