My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
