STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I know her cup size but not her name....
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
