its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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