You're my little dorito
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
