Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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